Life is filled with transitions, and one of the most profound transitions we experience is grief. Whether it stems from the loss of a loved one or another life-altering event, it can shake our foundation. In these moments, our “state of mind” and “state of being” are tested, revealing what I like to call our “B Attitudes.” These attitudes—rooted in our beliefs, mindset, and choices—ultimately shape how we respond to the challenges before us.
The Power of “B Attitudes”
Your “B Attitudes” represent more than a temporary mood; they reflect where you are emotionally residing. Are you living in despair or in determination? Are you giving in to hopelessness or cultivating hope? Recognizing where you stand is the first step toward shifting to a more positive, life-affirming place.
It’s important to note that going through the contrast of emotions—sadness, anger, denial—is part of the natural grief process. However, once you acknowledge these emotions, you can choose to take control. Think of it as being the captain of your ship: you might encounter turbulent waters, but you can steer toward calmer seas once you recognize you’re being pulled off course.
Movement in Grief
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “If you can’t fly, run. If you can’t run, walk. If you can’t walk, crawl. But by all means, keep moving.” This call to keep moving applies perfectly to grief. It’s not about avoiding pain or dismissing the deep feelings of loss; rather, it’s about not staying stuck in that pain indefinitely.
You may start off crawling in your grief journey, and that’s perfectly okay. Every small step you take adds up. Even a moment of relief or a single glimpse of hope can be a powerful catalyst. Remember, grief doesn’t vanish overnight, but it can evolve. The key is allowing yourself to move—inch by inch—through it.
Recognizing the Privilege of Life
Another essential aspect of healing is understanding that, while we mourn, we are still among the living. Life itself is a privilege, and tomorrow is promised to no one. The reality of mortality becomes even clearer in times of loss, reminding us to honor not just those we miss but also the life we still have.
In these moments, shifting your perspective to a state of appreciation can help elevate your vibration. According to research from institutions like Stanford, emotions carry energetic frequencies. Fear and despair rank among the lowest frequencies, while gratitude and love are among the highest. When you choose to focus on what remains meaningful—legacies, memories, present opportunities—you cultivate higher vibrations that support your healing journey.
Living Your Legacy Every Day
It’s not just about commemorating those who have passed; it’s also about actively living your own legacy day by day. What impact do you wish to leave on the world? How do you want to be remembered? While grief may slow you down, you can use it as a catalyst for personal growth and renewed appreciation for life. Sometimes, the contrast of loss is what highlights the preciousness of each moment we have left.
A Note on Certification and Professional Help
I share these insights as a Certified End-of-Life Coach, not as a medical doctor. While all stages of grief are important, it’s the movement through those stages that fosters healing. If you ever feel overwhelmed, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional for additional support. Everyone’s journey is unique, and sometimes professional guidance is crucial.
Conclusion
Recovering from grief is about harnessing awareness: recognizing when you’re in an unhealthy mindset and choosing to redirect toward a state of wellness. Even if it’s just one tiny step forward today, that single movement can change your tomorrow. Embrace each day as a gift. Honor your loved ones by honoring the life you still live. In doing so, you align with a higher vibration, stepping into a healthier state of mind and being—ready to live your own legacy and keep the memory of those you love alive in the most positive way possible.
Copyright © 2025 Patricia Freudenberg, Certified End-of-Life Coach. All Rights Reserved.
