Mindfulness: Grief Etiquette Do’s and Don’ts, Volume 9

By Patricia D. Freudenberg

It’s everywhere lately—books, podcasts, TED Talks—everyone’s talking about mindfulness. But in the context of grief, what does mindfulness really mean?

Mindfulness is not just a trendy term. At its core, it’s the practice of bringing awareness to the present moment. And for anyone navigating the early stages of grief, that can be both a challenge and a lifeline.

Grief has a way of dragging us into the past—what was, what could’ve been, what we’ve lost. It also tempts us into worrying about the future—what now, what next, how will I move forward? While both are natural, they can easily lead us down a mental spiral. The goal of mindfulness is to anchor us in the now.

Do: Be mindful of the present moment. Take one breath at a time. One step at a time. One day at a time. Whether you’re brushing your teeth, sipping tea, or watching the sun go down—be there. Really be there.

Don’t: Force yourself to plan the future or ruminate on the past too soon. Especially in the early days of grief, tomorrow can feel like a mountain and yesterday like a deep ocean. The present is your ground. Return to it. Breathe in it. Heal in it.

As a certified end-of-life coach and grief recovery author, I often teach that legacy is the seventh stage of grief, a beautiful reflective process that indeed invites us to revisit the past—but only after we’ve found our footing in the present.

Scientific Backing Research from Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE) supports the healing power of mindfulness. Studies show that practicing present-moment awareness can decrease emotional reactivity, lower stress hormone levels, and improve overall well-being. When the mind wanders, the body often stays tense; when the mind returns home to now, the body begins to soften.

So if you’re grieving, or supporting someone who is, remember: Mindfulness is not about fixing the pain. It’s about facing it—gently, bravely, presently.

Mindfulness is the path to recovery.

Recommended Reading

To support your journey with practical guidance and meditative tools, I recommend:

Mindfulness & Grief: With Guided Meditations to Calm Your Mind and Restore Your Spirit by Heather Stang This compassionate and practical book offers over 35 guided meditation, journaling, and yoga practices to help soothe the mind, body, and spirit during grief recovery. It’s a supportive companion for anyone seeking to anchor themselves gently in the present moment. 

Available on Amazon ⬇️

AVAILABLE ON AMAZON

© 2025 Patricia D. Freudenberg, Certified End-of-Life Coach. All Rights Reserved.